It occured to today that the only person who can really save you is you … I mean yeah by all means definitely see a therapist or whatever you need at least once in your life if you feel you need to but at the end of the day it’s YOU who has to put some work in!
You can tell your family & friends how bad you feel or that your pretty fed up lately, but no one is ever really going to understand.
I’ve had my fare share of days where my parents just do not understand anything to do with anxiety or depression, or thinking I use my own struggles as a way out card, BELIEVE ME I do not! I wouldn’t wish the feelings I have delt with at times on anyone and yes I no people deal with it all differently, I’m not comparing mine to anyones but today I realised the only person that can help me is me.
I truly belive I was given this lockdown as a way of maybe coming home & sorting my head out before venturing off anywhere again.. that’s how I am looking at it anyway! Yeah I know we are coming out of it slowly but the world as I see it has definitely changed, maybe for good? Who knows!
My point is this morning I woke up, did the same stupid thing I do where I check my phone before I get up, scroll down Facebook, nothing really beneficial to my mental state of mind.
Then after a coffee I decided to do a workout for like half an hour, just a random one on YouTube, embarrassingly I had to stop it half way through cos I was so out of breath, I had a break then carried on. Then I did some yoga. Then in the afternoon I still didn’t feel great so as much as I didn’t want to I dragged myself off the damn couch and went for a fast walk, anxious thoughts started flooding through my mind, not really understanding why they were there and so on and THEN it decided to rain and I’d only got my hair done yesterday but you know what happened next? I yes that’s right ME, started RUNNING!! In the rain and I enjoyed it! I felt alive!
I felt amazingly better by the time I got home, I see why people get addicted to running, you really feel a sort adrenaline feeling from it! I didn’t run the whole way home but I still ran and I super proud of myself for doing it!
Then tonight I was starting to feel a bit I dunno meh? So I stuck my headphones in and went for a proper run around my block! I cannot tell you how different I feel from what an hour a go?
I guess what I’m trying to say is you can do anything how ever bad you feel!